My sincerest apologies for the my absence since before Thanksgiving! Time truly does speed by - especially when we're busy. I have not felt the need to post much. And, I admit I do not always think to post things here! Something I hope to get better at doing.
This year has offered me a firm reminder of how important the positions school counselors play. Next year will be full of new things. Each year is, after all!
I plan to send home questionaires in April. I want to know what parents would like from me. What topics you would like covered in large group lessons as well as small group counseling. Finally, Mrs. Kim Henningsgard and I would like to offer at least one parenting workshop and we are working toward developing that. This year we will be offering a quick introduction during the P.T.O. meeting on May 10th! We are excited for this opportunity!
Watch for these questionaires and be sure to return them to me so I know what parents are looking for: what is going well, what is not...
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Friday, November 18, 2011
Full of Thanks: A Lesson in Humility
This is the time of year we are asked to look into our hearts and mindfully declare our thanksgivings .
For some of you it comes as a second nature as you are well practiced in finding humility in the small things. For others it may come as a challenge.
Like other things in life, practicing humility brings about an ease of being grateful. Ask your children what they are thankful for. Draw pictures together and tell them what you appreciate. Consider 'giving thanks' to be a simple and well versed family tradition.
No matter the place you are in, I hope you are able to celebrate in a way that brings about your thanksgivings - large or small. Happy Thanksgiving!
For some of you it comes as a second nature as you are well practiced in finding humility in the small things. For others it may come as a challenge.
Like other things in life, practicing humility brings about an ease of being grateful. Ask your children what they are thankful for. Draw pictures together and tell them what you appreciate. Consider 'giving thanks' to be a simple and well versed family tradition.
No matter the place you are in, I hope you are able to celebrate in a way that brings about your thanksgivings - large or small. Happy Thanksgiving!
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Secure Your Own Mask
Sometimes parents ask me for advice. I am always careful when doing so for the reason that I do not know them that well AND it is beyond the scope of my training. My best advice for parents struggling with something, whether it is their own feelings or how to work with a difficulty with their child, is to get the appropriate help for themselves. It is like telling passengers on an airplane to "secure your own airmask before assisting others". The same advice is true for me. If I want to be a successful (helpful) school counselor, I must seek help for any of my own struggles before assisting others.
I once again turn our attention to Parents magazine. It is as though after saying I did not find it very helpful, the writers found topics that would grab my attention!
This months edition featured an article I thought parents would want to read: "The One-Week Fix for Bad Behavior". I do not want to encourage anyone to believe we can fix problems in one week, but the underlying message is important. Here is what the author had to say: "My plan was to end my kids' whining, hitting, and tantrums in seven days. But first I had to change my own actions."
We cannot expect things around us to change if we do not change ourselves. For more information on that article, check out the October 2011 edition: page 56.
I once again turn our attention to Parents magazine. It is as though after saying I did not find it very helpful, the writers found topics that would grab my attention!
This months edition featured an article I thought parents would want to read: "The One-Week Fix for Bad Behavior". I do not want to encourage anyone to believe we can fix problems in one week, but the underlying message is important. Here is what the author had to say: "My plan was to end my kids' whining, hitting, and tantrums in seven days. But first I had to change my own actions."
We cannot expect things around us to change if we do not change ourselves. For more information on that article, check out the October 2011 edition: page 56.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
IQ? SQ? I've Heard About EQ!
I receive Parents magazine and hardly ever read it. However, there are a few headlines that catch my attention.
I am happy to say I was excited to see the article "Raise A Kid Who Cares: Fun Games That Teach Kindness" in the May 2011 issue.
More than a dozen pictures of a handsome boy display, well, more than a dozen faces that represent different feelings. Happy, sad, surprised, disgusted, angry, etc. While the photos are great, the header quote takes the cake:
When your baby cries and you pick him or her up and say "ooohhh, so sad" you are teaching your child empathy and the ability to recognize her feelings.
I am happy to say I was excited to see the article "Raise A Kid Who Cares: Fun Games That Teach Kindness" in the May 2011 issue.
An ability to recognize and understand emotions can help your kid have better friendships, succeed in school, and even become closer with you. (Rones, 2011).
EQ stands for Emotional Quotient. Word is (research supported) EQ is a higher indicator of future success than IQ (Intelligence Quotient) and that EQ supports IQ and SQ. SQ is Social Quotient, something we'll get to later. The good news is we can help support and boost our children's EQ. Like everything else, it starts before school age.
When your baby cries and you pick him or her up and say "ooohhh, so sad" you are teaching your child empathy and the ability to recognize her feelings.
When my oldest, Evan, was 2 he really liked the Disney movie Brother Bear. At one point Kenai, one of the bears, makes an angry face and my dad (who is always one to watch Disney with the kids) said "oh, he's angry, look at his face". This is how we create a teaching moment - in the every day parts of life. Like learning to read, it can be fun, and it should be a part of every day.
The following are a couple of the games the article featured in order to promote EQ (you'll notice the idea is to recognize others' emotions and think about what others are thinking):
1. Magical Mind Reading
THE LESSON: You can sense feelings.
SET THE SCENE: Go to the playground. During a break from the swings, sit and have a snack and observe all the emotions others have around you.
HOW TO PLAY: Point out a kid in your vicinity (like the boy who's laughing hysterically as he's being spun around on the merry-go-round), and ask your child to guess what he's thinking. Look for opportunities to identify different feelings, such as that of the little girl who seems angry because she hasn't been able to make it across the monkey bars after numerous tries or the toddler who looks fearful about going down the slide. You can also ask your child to pick out a couple moms or dads and describe what's going on in their head too.
2. Emotions in Motion
THE LESSON: Body language is a wonderful way to express feelings.
SET THE SCENE: Make a playlist of songs that range in mood and tempo - including both fast and slow tunes that sound calm, happy, sad, and even angry. "Few things capture emotions like music," says Dr. Feldman. Some songs you might include: Laurie Berkner's "I Feel Crazy So I Jump in the Soup" and "The Happiest Song I Know" as well as "Twist and Shout" and "Yesterday" by The Beatles, "Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina and the Waves, and "I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan. you can also include a few classical numbers too, such as Claude Debussy's "Clair de Lune" or Aaron Copland's "Hoedown." Then turn up the volume.
HOW TO PLAY: Using movements and facial expressions, act out the mood of the music that's playing. Fore example, the two of you might pretend that you're sad or sleepy when the music is slow and mellow; when the rhythm picks up and gets louder, you might express excitement with happy kicks or by raising your arms up as if you're cheering for a team that just scored. To help a young child label emotions, encourage her to call them when the music changes (she might say, "Ooh, I'm so angry", or "Ah! I'm scared!". Make it fun by incorporating some silly dance steps for your child to imitate - and fell free to skip to the next song if you find yourselves repeating the same moves over and over.
The following are a couple of the games the article featured in order to promote EQ (you'll notice the idea is to recognize others' emotions and think about what others are thinking):
1. Magical Mind Reading
THE LESSON: You can sense feelings.
SET THE SCENE: Go to the playground. During a break from the swings, sit and have a snack and observe all the emotions others have around you.
HOW TO PLAY: Point out a kid in your vicinity (like the boy who's laughing hysterically as he's being spun around on the merry-go-round), and ask your child to guess what he's thinking. Look for opportunities to identify different feelings, such as that of the little girl who seems angry because she hasn't been able to make it across the monkey bars after numerous tries or the toddler who looks fearful about going down the slide. You can also ask your child to pick out a couple moms or dads and describe what's going on in their head too.
2. Emotions in Motion
THE LESSON: Body language is a wonderful way to express feelings.
SET THE SCENE: Make a playlist of songs that range in mood and tempo - including both fast and slow tunes that sound calm, happy, sad, and even angry. "Few things capture emotions like music," says Dr. Feldman. Some songs you might include: Laurie Berkner's "I Feel Crazy So I Jump in the Soup" and "The Happiest Song I Know" as well as "Twist and Shout" and "Yesterday" by The Beatles, "Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina and the Waves, and "I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan. you can also include a few classical numbers too, such as Claude Debussy's "Clair de Lune" or Aaron Copland's "Hoedown." Then turn up the volume.
HOW TO PLAY: Using movements and facial expressions, act out the mood of the music that's playing. Fore example, the two of you might pretend that you're sad or sleepy when the music is slow and mellow; when the rhythm picks up and gets louder, you might express excitement with happy kicks or by raising your arms up as if you're cheering for a team that just scored. To help a young child label emotions, encourage her to call them when the music changes (she might say, "Ooh, I'm so angry", or "Ah! I'm scared!". Make it fun by incorporating some silly dance steps for your child to imitate - and fell free to skip to the next song if you find yourselves repeating the same moves over and over.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Kinship and FFA Pals
We are fortunate to be able to offer Kinship and FFA PALS to students here at the elementary.
Kinship of Polk County runs the mentoring program here in the school. It is a mentoring program that seeks to provide guiding and nurturing relationships for children. The school mentoring program matches carefully screened high school students with elementary age children. The "match" meets once a week for half an hour, at the school, during the school day, throughout the school year.
A carefully screened volunteer will provide your child with a caring relationship. The two will enjoy such activities as talking, listening, games, reading, art/craft projects and much more. In addition, in the past Kinship offered group activities such as a swim night, snow tubing, Valley Fair and more that the child was welcome to attend.
Meaningful relationships such as those set up through Kinship and FFA PALS promote positive self-esteem, self-confidence and a respect for others. In addition, studies have shown that students with mentors are more likely to stay in school, get better grades and go to college while less likely to start experimenting with alcohol and drugs.
FFA PALS is very similar to Kinship with its set up and mode of operation. The mentors are members of the high school FFA program. The pair also meets here at the school once a week for roughly a half hour and throughout the whole school year.
The two programs together offer roughly 20-30 mentoring matches. We are so grateful for both programs and their advisors.
Most students are referred by teachers. Once in Kinship, we hope the match will continue as long as both the mentor and mentee are in school. If you would like either opportunity for your child, contact myself (Mrs. Ailts) or your child's teacher.
Kinship of Polk County runs the mentoring program here in the school. It is a mentoring program that seeks to provide guiding and nurturing relationships for children. The school mentoring program matches carefully screened high school students with elementary age children. The "match" meets once a week for half an hour, at the school, during the school day, throughout the school year.
A carefully screened volunteer will provide your child with a caring relationship. The two will enjoy such activities as talking, listening, games, reading, art/craft projects and much more. In addition, in the past Kinship offered group activities such as a swim night, snow tubing, Valley Fair and more that the child was welcome to attend.
Meaningful relationships such as those set up through Kinship and FFA PALS promote positive self-esteem, self-confidence and a respect for others. In addition, studies have shown that students with mentors are more likely to stay in school, get better grades and go to college while less likely to start experimenting with alcohol and drugs.
FFA PALS is very similar to Kinship with its set up and mode of operation. The mentors are members of the high school FFA program. The pair also meets here at the school once a week for roughly a half hour and throughout the whole school year.
The two programs together offer roughly 20-30 mentoring matches. We are so grateful for both programs and their advisors.
Most students are referred by teachers. Once in Kinship, we hope the match will continue as long as both the mentor and mentee are in school. If you would like either opportunity for your child, contact myself (Mrs. Ailts) or your child's teacher.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Helping Hand Newsletter, Volume 22 Issue 1
Helping Hand Newsletter is a resource published monthly and provides information to its readers. This month's topics include the following: Disciplining your child, Children of alcoholics deal with many feelings, Inhalants at home and school, Tips for preventing school violence, Text messaging may improve written language skills, and Understanding childhood fears: Building trust and security. To read more, visit this site: Helping Hand PDP
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Welcome Back Message
Welcome back! The 2011-2012 School Year is near! I am excited to be back after a year long maternity leave with my youngest son, Calvin.
Calvin is my third boy. My oldest Evan will be starting Kindergarten this year, so I know what parents feel like during the busy month of August. School supplies, schedules, bussing, before and after school care, and much much more. What I tend to focus on is "What does this feel like?" I don't know about you, but my stomach can get tense thinking too far ahead: Will he behave? Will he be liked by his peers? Will he be scared? Will he learn?
Many students and parents are overwhelmed with feelings as something new begins. That is where I can be of service.
I will be visiting with all the children in their classrooms during the first couple weeks of school. I have many goals, but my main one is to let the children know what they can do during both the tough and the exciting times of this part of life. And, that includes me, their counselor, but it is surely not limited to me. I encourage students to turn to their family, peers, and other school staff (yes, even the cooks and bus drivers). We make up a community. And, as they say, it takes a village to raise a child. I will do my role and help others in theirs.
Please check here often as I plan to use this website to post updates and resources for the community (parents, school staff, and others alike). I will also be sharing this site with the older students, as they can refer here if needed.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Ailts - Elementary School Counselor
Calvin is my third boy. My oldest Evan will be starting Kindergarten this year, so I know what parents feel like during the busy month of August. School supplies, schedules, bussing, before and after school care, and much much more. What I tend to focus on is "What does this feel like?" I don't know about you, but my stomach can get tense thinking too far ahead: Will he behave? Will he be liked by his peers? Will he be scared? Will he learn?
Many students and parents are overwhelmed with feelings as something new begins. That is where I can be of service.
I will be visiting with all the children in their classrooms during the first couple weeks of school. I have many goals, but my main one is to let the children know what they can do during both the tough and the exciting times of this part of life. And, that includes me, their counselor, but it is surely not limited to me. I encourage students to turn to their family, peers, and other school staff (yes, even the cooks and bus drivers). We make up a community. And, as they say, it takes a village to raise a child. I will do my role and help others in theirs.
Please check here often as I plan to use this website to post updates and resources for the community (parents, school staff, and others alike). I will also be sharing this site with the older students, as they can refer here if needed.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Ailts - Elementary School Counselor
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